AN: o.o I really don't have anything to say here...except, Chocolate Doughnuts are yummy. x_x;;

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'How dare they do this to me? Just wait...Grr......' those were the thoughts of one angry chibi as stars and planets flew by his pod at an extraordinary speed, looking like mere flashes of color and light.

Suddenly, a bright, red, pulsing light filled the ship, startling the young prince and causing him to bang his head against the side.

"Kami-sama..." he winced, rubbing his head in pain.

"We will reach the planet Earth in countdown: 5...4...3...2...1..." said a computerized voice from the speakers. Vegita braced himself for the landing, tensing his muscles. No matter how high tech the scientists made these things, the landing was 'always' bad.

The pod broke through the ozone, leaving behind a faint glow. Finally, after what seemed like hours, it crashed into a remote beach, sending yellow sand flying everywhere.

The hatch opened slowly, steam escaping from inside. The prince jumped out, narrowly missing a crab. Blinking, he stared at the unpopulated surroundings with a disgusted expression on his face. Peachy. Was this it? Was this what Earth was? A big bucket of sand?

Joy.

Growling, he began walking in a random direction, hoping to find some sign of life.

Then promptly tripped.

As he glared daggers at the same damn crab from before, a vein popped out on his forehead, "I see how it is. So, you...Earthlings want me dead, eh? Well, I wont go down without a fight, you hear me!"

The crab gave him a look that clearly said 'Are-you-kidding-me?'.

Narrowing his eyes, Vegita stepped around the crab and blasted off into the air, "You got off easy!" he yelled back.

When he was high enough, he stopped and looked around.

Ah. A city.

Sighing in relief, he flew in the direction of the settlement. As he landed in a local park, he received many a stare.

Come on now, can you really blame them? I mean, here you are, relaxing by a tree, and out of the sky comes a small child who's muscles could make gown men weep with envy. And don't even get me started on the clothes!

The stares, however, were getting on the Chibi's nerves. He felt like some mutated goldfish in a fish tank.

"What? Haven't you weaklings ever seen a Saiya-jin prince before?' he demanded, hands on his hips.

Blank looks were the only responses that he got.

"I take that as a no..."

Then, something happened. Something that would haunt him for the rest of his life. Something that was scarier than Nappa in a Speedo, and that...well....that could make your eye's bleed.

Four large, scary, old women appeared, seemingly out of nowhere. Their pudgy faces were smeared with bright, colorful make-up, and they wore flower print dresses that were 'much' too tight for their elephant-like figures.

One by one, they squealed in high pitched voices, and skipped, yes, that’s right, SKIPPED, over to Vegita.

"Oh! Would you look at this, Poebanna!"

"Isn't he just an ickle darling, Soehanna?"

"Come give your Aunt Joefanna a nice, big hug!"

"Why, I could just eat you up! Don't you think so, Doelanna?"

Vegita stared in horror, unable to move, as the 'Things' moved in for the kill. They towered over him, trying to pull the flesh off his cheeks in a torture method they called 'Pinching'. His body shook as tremors passed him, but still, his feet were stuck to the ground.

People nearby looked at him in sympathy, but they sure as hell wouldn't try to help. No way, not when there was a chance that the creatures might come after 'them' next. A little girl started crying. The ladies reminded her of the Boogieman that lived in her closet. Her mother covered her eyes and hugged her, whispering soothing words.

One man had to catch his lover as he passed out from fear.

Vegita whimpered. It was times like these that he wanted his 'own' mummy. As adrenalin flowed through his veins, he got a splurge of bravery and blasted out of the area as fast as his kai would let him. When he reached the altitude of 10,000ft, he finally felt safe and slowed down, rubbing his pink cheeks in disbelief.

And he thought the 'female Saiya-jins' were scary when their Aunt Flow visited. That part always confused him. Not once had he seen a woman named Aunt Flow, and he should have, seeing as how he was tolled that she came once a month. Weird.

After his heart stopped beating 100mph, he flew to a location that was far, 'far' away from the park and the strange Anna ladies. He settled down under a large bridge that had crude writings and pictures spray painted on its cement walls.

He let out a loud sigh as he slumped to the ground. He'd been here for less than 10 minutes and he had 'already' been mauled. There was no justice left in the universe, seriously.

Vegita's brooding was interrupted as a skinny form slunk out from the shadows.

"Well, well, well, what have we here?" a teenaged boy with greasy, unwashed green hair asked. The silver earring in his nose glittered in the light, even though it looked like it was covered with dried up snot. He slouched, hands in his torn up pants pockets. He walked over Vegita and leered at him from above.

"Can I help you?" the Ouji asked, eyebrow raised in amusement.

"Oh hoho...so, you're not afraid of me, are you? Well, you should. I'm Spider, and this is my territory that you're in, so I suggest that you scram before I beat your ass back to where you came from!"

Vegita couldn't help it. It was just too much. He burst out laughing, ignoring the annoyed look on 'Spiders' face.

"That has got to be the stupidest thing I have heard all day! Listen, Earthling, I'm feeling generous, so if you leave now I promise I won't kill you." Vegita said, smirking.

"I'd watch that mouth of yours, kid." Spider growled. He grabbed the top of Vegita's cape and pulled him up to his feet, "I tried to be nice, but now you're gonna get it- GAH!"

No one touches the princes special-made cape except the prince himself.

Well, ok, and the cleaners, but...

Anyway, Spider soon found himself laying beside a garbage can, eyes swirling and little birds flying in circles around his head. He moaned in pain, clutching at his stomach and trying to prevent the urge to throw up.

"Mmm....mbb....MLARGHhh...."

Trying being the key word here.

"Ewwww...." Vegita scrunched up his nose at the spell and the...colorful-ness. Purple. Wow.

What the hell kind of food was purple?

He shook his head in wonder and was just about to comment on that when he heard voices in the distance that made his blood run cold.

"He's this way Joefanna!"

"How do you know, Doelanna?"

"I can smell him."

"...Oh..."

He did the only thing he could do. Vegita panicked.

With a quick wave to Spider, he blasted off into the air once more, leaving the other boy to meet his faith at the hands of the deranged females. He winces he heard his screams of pain and thanked the Gods that he could fly.

Vegita thought over the day while a sweatdrop formed on the back of his head. So far, there had been one attempt at assassination by the...thing at the beach, one attack by a random Earthling, and two maulings.

What was this? Kill Vegita Day?

Suddenly, bright flashes of light and loud music caught his attention. He looked down at a group of tents and strange machines that twirled, went around in circles, and did other pointless and mundane things.

Shrugging to himself, he landed in front of a booth that smelled strongly of some exotic food.

He stared at a the sign on the window with wide eyes. Cotton candy? They had...candy made out of cotton? How interesting. Weird beyond belief, but interesting none the less.

Oh, candy apples. People here just made candy out of everything, didn't they? Cotton, apples, what was next? Shoes?

Raising an eyebrow, he yelled to the guy with the dyed shirt behind the little counter, "Hey! You! Yes, you, male Earthling! Get me some food, now!'

The surfer dude nodded, grinning, "Sure thing, little dude, what would you like?"

Vegita blinked, "Ah, get me...three bags of the pink cotton, seven apples, yea, those shiny ones, and...five bags of the little yellow buttery...things."

"You mean popcorn, dude?"

"Yes. The corn that pops."

"Alright, dude, here you go," the man said, handing everything to Vegita carefully, "That comes to be $32.76."

"What are you going on about, Earthling?"

"Dude, you have to pay to get the food!"

"Oh." with that said, Vegita walked away, ignoring the protests from the surfer man. He popped some of the corn into his mouth and smiled. Hey, this stuff was pretty good. He should give the recipe to the chefs back on Vegita-sei.

He walked around a large blue tent as sat down next to it. As he munched on his assorted junk food, he could vaguely make out a conversation that was happening around a corner.

"You are the most beautiful female that I have ever seen! Marry me!"

He knew that voice...

"What? No! Please, Mister, I only met you two minutes ago!" a softer voice said in a somewhat agitated tone.

"Come on! What have you got to loose? I'm one of the Elite fighters from my home!"

"That’s...nice, sir, really, but..."

"You're eyes shine like the brightest stars-"

"Sir!?"

Frowning, Vegita walked around the tent in curiosity. When he neared he couple, his eyes widened and he promptly dropped all the food he was holding.

"Raditsu?" he chocked out, mouth hanging agape.

The long haired figure turned around and gasped, "Vegita-Ouji?!"

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AN: There. This version was much longer than the original.

~[Onto Chapter Three!]~

This page last updated December 4, 2004.